A Tribute to a Great Woman

Tomorrow we will meet together to celebrate the life of a great woman. She was my mother-in-law. She was a second mother to me. She put all other MIL's in the world to shame.

From the day we said "I do" she never stopped supporting our marriage, or supporting me. She told me what a blessing I was to her family, how happy she was that I was in her family, and that she loved me like I was her own. From her actions over the years, I know that she meant every word.

When Boaz and I needed time away from the kids early in our marriage, she was there. Whenever I was sick and needed some help, she was there. When I needed a listening ear or a shopping companion, she was there. She was always there.

When I decided to go back to college, she showed up faithfully every Saturday morning to take the kids for a few hours so I could study. When we decided to build a new house, twice, she was there, taking pictures and taking part in our happiness. When I graduated from college, she was there, bringing me gifts and going out to celebrate.

She never missed a birthday party. She never missed an opportunity to share of herself. To be around her was to be encouraged and uplifted. I loved her so much and I miss her so much. I was never able to give back to her as much as she gave to me. But in honor of her I know there is one thing I can do, one thing that she would love for me to do. Someday, when I'm a mother-in-law, I want to be just like her.

Telephone

Last night we had a hilarious time playing Telephone. Have any of you ever played it? It works like this: Someone thinks of a sentence or two, and whispers it in the ear of the person next to them. From there it is a passed to each member of the group, and then said aloud by the last person. I mentioned it casually while we were eating dinner, and Bucky asked if we could play it right now. We all agreed and the fun got started. It was hilarious. It was the most I've laughed in a long time. Sometimes just the looks on my children's faces as they heard the message, obviously having been jumbled, and then trying to stop laughing long enough to repeat it to the next person. Some examples: "Pink flamingos have big feet and long pretty eyelashes" was shortened to "Big booger noses" and another that I don't remember the original to ended up as "Your ears are ugly and your bottom is saggy". We had a blast. If you have kids that are old enough, you should really try it. It helps to have a couple of little ones thrown in to really mess things up. :~)

Life is really settling into something resembling our former family life, only bigger. The girls are almost as obedient as my older kids. The biggest difficulty discipline-wise continues to be when they are away from us, such as at school and on the bus. My older kids are accepting the girls more as part of our family and resenting them less. I've stopped beating myself up about my feelings and have accepted that it will take time and that we are in quite normal stages of the process. It just can't be hurried, no matter how hard I try.

Over time, Bubbles and Blondie's unique personalities are starting to really show through. Both girls are very helpful. Blondie wants to be wherever you are, doing whatever you are doing. She always wants to help. Bubbles wants to help too, but she is content to work alone on her tasks, and she frequently just picks up the broom to sweep without being told to, and she spent two hours washing dishes because she wanted to and asked if she could. I had to restrain myself from "helping" her, because she was so slow and I could have probably had it done in thirty minutes. (We had quite a stack of dishes leftover that don't fit in the dishwasher). She plodded along and I actually had to make her stop so we could eat dinner. I was really impressed and told her so more than once.

Both girls are little sweethearts. Their hugs and kisses have become more "real". I don't know the best way to explain it, but they melt into me more now. They aren't stiff and just going through the motions. Hugs last longer, and they sense my moods and know when I need one. It's really sweet. They have both also started to really admire their big sister. They like to be around her, spend time with her and give her hugs. It took several months before it became genuine, but I can see now that the relationship is growing on both sides.

Bucky doesn't complain about them anymore. He plays games with them and chases them around the house. He doesn't get so jealous when he sees me interacting with them. It's become a normal, everyday thing for him to see and he doesn't feel so threatened.

I can look back now and see how far we have come. It's a wonderful thing. It just takes TIME.