Homeschool Decision

After praying and talking to my husband, and various others, I have decided to homeschool Blondie. Most of the response I have gotten from others has been negative. They tell me that it will tie me down and I will lose my freedom. That is true. It's quite possible that I won't be able to attend BSF unless I switch to evenings instead of mornings. My husband really doesn't want me to go in the evenings and disrupt my time with him. But I decided that Blondie is more important than BSF, and I will give it up if I need to. BSF will still be there when I finish homeschooling her. When I prayed about it, after struggling with it for days on my own, I felt a great peace that this was the right thing to do.

I don't know how long it will be. It might be just for one year, or it might be the rest of her school career. I really don't know.

I found out from her teacher that she will be passing third grade. There was a question about it for a while. She has already repeated first grade, and if she were to fail again, she would be in the same grade as her sister who is two years younger. I couldn't let that happen, and so I was definitely going to homeschool in that case. But since she is passing, I have a choice.

Most people thought that I wouldn't homeschool now since I don't HAVE to. But there's more to it than that for me. The child is so emotionally messed up, to the point she almost doesn't have emotions. She's all happy, all the time. I'm sure that's what she thinks she has to do. I can see that Bubbles has more emotional reactions than Blondie. Bubbles is more attached than Blondie.

Blondie has a lower IQ. I think that she will be able to function normally in society, but it would be easy for not-nice people to take advantage of her. I think that she will learn more from me, one-on-one, than just barely scraping by with a busy teacher in the classroom.

She wasn't nurtured and cherished as a baby. Then Bubbles was born less than two years later, and I believe Blondie was pushed aside in favor of the baby. Blondie tries to be just like Bubbles. We have worked on it and it has improved, but she still thinks Bubbles is better than her and that she will get more attention and love if she copies Bubbles. I have also noticed that she is insecure around Bubbles. When we are working together on her homework, she will be doing okay, but if Bubbles comes to sit down and listen, suddenly Blondie can't focus or remember anything. And that is with Bubbles just sitting quietly and not even distracting her.

I feel like Blondie needs this year at home with me, just to be loved and cherished and have Mom all to herself all day. I hope that this will build her confidence in herself and allow her to feel important, and learn to give and receive love. I'm really choosing to do this more for that reason than for the education part of it, but I believe that it's worth it for that end of it too.

Those of you who are praying people, please pray for me that I will be able to be organized and keep up the pace, because this is a new endeavor for me. I went to Mardel and bought several workbooks to help me get going. I got math, spelling, language arts, phonics, reading, handwriting, social studies and science. I also plan to teach her piano, sewing, cooking and bible stories.

I really think it will be good for both of us. The next hurdle will be to notify the school that she won't be attending next year, though I'm not exactly sure how to do that.

Mama & The Birthday

When Bubbles and Blondie moved in they immediately began calling us Mommy & Daddy. Being that they were already 8 & 6, we didn't know how they would feel about that, but it didn't seem to bother them a bit. My older kids call me Mom, Mama, Mommy and sometimes Bucky even calls me Mompo. He's 13, and he makes up cute names, like he calls my mom Grammy-Cakes. Too cute.

Anyway, Bubbles has started calling me Mama, quite regularly now for the past few days. I really like it. It's more personal and feels more affectionate. It warms my heart when I hear it.

Today I'm letting Blondie stay home from school to celebrate her birthday. I did the same thing on Babygirl's and Bubbles' last birthdays. We go out to eat and shopping and whatever strikes us as fun.

Gotta go get ready!