Why Oh Why

Bubbles had just finished her sentences last night. She was helping put away clothes and we were having a great time. We were getting dinner ready, and planning to play Mario Cart and do some bible drills after supper. Blondie was working to finish her sentences so she could participate too.

Bubbles was playing with a little doll toy, and I asked her to go put it away in her room. Then as she was putting away some clothes, I felt the urge to go and check her folder. When I looked in her backpack, I found the little doll toy I'd asked her to put away not five minutes ago. The problem with it being in her backpack is twofold. First of all, I asked her to put it away in her room and she didn't do it. Secondly, and more important, she was grounded from taking any toys to school for the rest of the year because she gets in trouble at school with the toys she brings.

I decided to give her a chance to tell the truth. I called her to come to me, and I pointedly asked her what she did with the little doll. She told me that she put it away. I asked her where, and she said she took it upstairs and put it in her room. I pressed for more details and she said she put it under her bed. Her backpack was downstairs.

So then I asked her how it got in her backpack if she took it upstairs and put it under her bed in her room. She said, "Oh.....um.....well, I think I meant to put it on the floor." Then she said, "Well, I thought I put it in my room" and then "I was trying to put it on the floor". Finally after I continued to press her, she told me that she put it in her backpack because she was trying to sneak it to school, which of course I already knew.

Ironically, our church is working on obedience for the theme of the month. I'm really glad, because we really need it! Bubbles had to have a sandwich and go to bed early for that outright disobedience.

Fast forward to this morning. I went upstairs to wake up the girls and choose their clothes for the day. Blondie's shirt had been crammed between the clothes with no hanger, on her side of the closet. I questioned Blondie about it and I could tell that she was genuinely puzzled, or at least it really seemed like she was. However, both girls lie to me every day, so it can be really hard to tell. I looked over at Bubbles where she was waiting and she looked me right in the eye with a very serious face and said she didn't do it. Something on her face told me she was lying, but I couldn't be completely sure.

Today was field day at school. I told the girls that whoever put the shirt in the closet that way just needed to tell me so that we could move on about our day. However, we were going to stand there until they told me. Blondie started to cry and kept protesting her innocence. Bubbles stood quietly with no expression and never said a word. I told the girls that time was passing and that we needed to have breakfast and baths and wouldn't have time for everything if we didn't get past this. I told them if we kept it up, we would even miss field day. We continued to stand there for ten minutes or so, with me explaining that it was just a shirt that wasn't hung up in the closet, and that there was nothing to fear from me. Finally, I decided to take it downstairs. We went down in the kitchen and I started making lunches for my kids. After a full twenty minutes or so, Bubbles finally confessed. She told me that she had taken Blondie's shirt off the hanger, and stuck it back in the clothes in order to get Blondie in trouble.

I immediately released Blondie so that she could run up and get a shower before school. I had a long discussion with Bubbles about her choices, and the consequences of her choices.

It is so disappointing to see a child already in trouble not learning from her consequences, and just continuing to do things that will get her in more trouble. She's such a sweet little girl, very loving and happy, but she really has trouble with obedience. And now, sadly, I am aware that she is willing to sabottage her sister.

I just feel so defeated sometimes. What does it take to get her to understand that her life will be so much easier and better when she stops fighting us?