Friday, September 30, 2005

Report Card


My son brought home his report card yesterday. But before I tell you how he did, let me tell you this - the kid is a genius. He's smarter than either of his parents. He can outwit and out-argue almost anyone. He has certainly stretched all my natural parenting abilities to their very limits.

This year he was very excited that he got into the gifted and talented (GT) program. He was tested for it the year before, but he decided the test was too hard and didn't try. At the end of last year he really wanted to be in GT so he put in the extra effort and passed the test. He has loved being in it so far. They have them do creative exercises and work puzzles and he's having a great time.

So yesterday he brought home 2 A's, 1 low B and 2 high C's. It's ridiculous. I found out that he was tested four times over a book he didn't read, and that he was supposed to read other books for points. I'm sure that he purposely didn't let me know.

At their school, they do all their work there and don't bring any books home. They have classroom sets of books. This severely limits me as a parent to know what material he is working on that I might be able to help him with. They do send home a schedule each week that I have to sign, but listed on it are things like "Complete Worksheet A". That really doesn't give me enough to work with!

So! He's grounded. He's lost all his privileges to all electronics (Computer, Gameboy, Gamecube) and we took the TV out of his room. He's also grounded from being in the boy band they started. He will read for 15 minutes at home every day, and he will tell me what they are working on in school so I can make sure he understands the concepts. He admitted that he had not been doing his best, and also that he had been confused about some things and not asked for help.

I know that right now you are thinking I'm a pretty harsh parent. But I know my son, and I know he can do better. It takes pretty big consequences to get through to him. And I want him to understand early in life that SCHOOL MATTERS. If he blows it off, he'll never be able to be an architect, or a lawyer, or an engineer, or whatever he wants to be this week, because he won't be able to get into college.

If he brings up his grades to straight As by the three weeks progress report, he gets to choose one item to have back. He gets it all back with a report card in six weeks that has straight As, and I may relent if there is nothing lower than high Bs.

I never compare my kids in front of them, but just between us, Daughter is so much easier. That kids works herself to a nub. She is very responsible and does everything she is told to do. I'm sure it has something to do with being the oldest and that we are harder on her. So I feel like I really need to knuckle down on him now before it is too late.

Also, I'm concerned that they will kick him out of GT. He is really enjoying it and I think there is value in it. On the other hand, I may pull him out of it myself if he can't keep up his grades.

So for all you parents-to-be who read my blog, welcome to one of the joys of parenting. Second-guessing yourself. Am I being too hard on him? Have I been too easy on him? Is this my fault? Am I expecting too much? Have I not paid enough attention???? And so it goes.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Its so hard to say with kids. For me, that would of been a bad report card. For my daughter, I tell her she needs to get C's or better. But that is because we are dealing with a lot of issues with her.

No Longer In Crisis said...

I, for one, definately don't think of that as harsh punishment. I was just like your son - sounded like you were telling my story. I was one of the GT program kids who brought home B's and C's. High school and college days were no different. Had my parents had the time or energy to really address the problem, it might have helped. The good news is that when grad school rolled around, I was A's all the way - the world was mine. I gave my poor parents such grief - and my younger brother was straight-A's from the time he could talk. And he got 2 MBA degrees with highest honors and earns more than I can ever hope to see in a lifetime - and he's 7 yrs younger than me. Sounds just like your Shalie. We each turned out to be "successful" in different ways, by different standards. But still, I wish I had focused more in school instead of day dreaming or whatever else drew my fascination more than my homework.

I admire your fortitude. Your kids are lucky to have you on the lookout.