Just One More Day

In a little more than twenty-four hours, I'll be meeting the girls. It will only be an observation time at the foster-mom's house, and the girls will have no idea that we are interested in becoming their parents. I think that is a good thing. I know that they are still trying to come to terms with the fact that they won't ever be going back home.

I feel excitement, fear, and a terrible sadness. The excitement comes from the part of me that wants more children, and wants to love them and raise them and provide a good Godly home for them. I think the fear is really just fear of the unknown. Meeting them will make them real people to me, instead of just names and descriptions. The terrible sadness come from knowing what kinds of things have happened to them in the past, and from imagining all the things I don't even know about yet.

How can someone hurt a child? A child is dependent on you from the moment they are born. How can someone betray that trust? We were taught in training that we should not feel anger at the birth parents, because they are sick. I think that will be very hard for me to do when I see their sweet little faces, knowing that none of what happened to them is their fault, and knowing how much hurt and pain they have experienced in their short lives.

In the bible, Jesus felt righteous anger and overturned a few tables in the temple and called the men there thieves. I feel like overturning a few tables myself, on behalf of all the children out there that have been victimized. How I wish I could help them all. I heard a great saying that I'll repeat here:

"I may not be able to save the whole world, but I can save one child's world." And in my case, I guess that's two.